What Do You Do? A Better Elevator Pitch with Jason Treu

Source: GeniusDen archive transcript checked against the recording. Administrative opening and closing material is omitted; the presentation wording is otherwise preserved with light readability edits.

Tonight before I came out I was talking to my mom. My mom works in a hospital with doctors. I told her I was speaking and she said, "Oh, today I was talking to a bunch of doctors and I was telling them what you do," and I was like to myself, "This is pretty scary," and I was stuttering on the phone. She said to me, "You help businesspeople ring the register, kick butt, and figure out what they want to do in life." Then she said to the doctors, "Well, you're a lawyer, so they better be nice to you, otherwise you're going to sue them." I thought that was rather amusing at the time.

One of the things people want to find out all the time is how to answer the question, "What is it that you do?" Because most times you answer it, it's a very boring answer. It's mundane, and frankly, it puts people to sleep. It's a conversation killer and, frankly, a relationship killer. I want to talk today about that, and also at the end we're going to practice this, so you're actually going to get to talk to other people and give your elevator pitch.

One of the reasons why this is a big challenge is when you're talking to people about what it is that you do, that initial question—if you ask it at the beginning—is sizing people up. It's a comparison question, so people get really uncomfortable with it. Oftentimes you'll see their body language and they're actually moving backward because they're trying to protect themselves; people will cross their arms. That's never a good way to start a conversation. Secondly, they've had this conversation so many times, probably thousands of times, that they'll tune you out. They won't be present; they'll be thinking about what they have to do tomorrow, the pressing things in their life.

I want to talk about how you can think about a relationship structure and a successful way of approaching that. First, it's about building rapport with people because you have to find common ground. Second is likability—people spend time with people they like, they do business with people they like. Third is the glue and fabric that keeps our society together: trust. If you don't have trust with someone, you literally have nothing. If you can do those things when you first meet someone, you'll create intrigue and you'll get people who want to follow up with you.

The way I like to think about it as an equation is: number one, connection—you have to connect with someone, very similar to rapport; number two, you have to care—it's really important to care about other people and you can do that authentically even when you first meet someone; and number three, adding value—that's probably the secret sauce that will move relationships farther ahead and accelerate them more than anything else. People in your life that you don't have a scorecard with are in your inner circle—parents, spouse, best friends. When you make deposits in the relationship bank account before you make withdrawals, you find out some pretty magical things.

One of the things I like to ask people early on—I've rarely been asked this, and I've asked a lot of people—is, "What are you really passionate about? What projects are you working on that you're really excited about?" You have to understand what's driving people. Asking that question is the best way to start building rapport.

I want to talk about four keys in figuring out how to tell someone what you do. I'll read you a quote from Maya Angelou: "People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." No one is ever going to remember the microscopic details of what you tell them about what you do, but they're going to remember how you made them feel. We're all run by emotions; we do everything for a feeling. You hang around certain people because they elicit a feeling from you. You go to work because of the feeling it elicits.

When you talk about what you do, talk about the end benefit. Paint a picture so people can actually see what you're doing. If someone asks, "What do you do?" and you say, "I'm an accountant," that doesn't leave a lot of room for follow-up; it's not very exciting. But if you're a project manager, you could say, "I make people's lives easier on my team," or, "I'm the glue that keeps people on our team together so they can get results and keep clients happy."

The third thing is audience. People don't think about this: you have to have different elevator speeches for different audiences. If you talk to someone in your industry, they'll get the technical aspects. If you talk to a friend, they might not. If you talk to your grandmother, she clearly won't know all the jargon. The three audiences I think about are industry, friends, and my grandmother.

The fourth is connecting and resonating. You have to find out what people care about, and you do that by asking questions. "What are you passionate about?" is one of the first questions you should ask because you'll get more information and connect back with them. For instance, if someone is a lawyer, you might say, "Just like you need to influence a judge, when I'm in a boardroom making a presentation I have to influence the board of directors to buy into my plan." When you do something like that, you show someone you're an active listener—you heard what they said and repeated it back—and that makes a very strong connection. It gets people to like you more, builds rapport, and leads to more trust.

So when you're thinking about what you do, here's a fill-in-the-blank process. I'll give an example from an event planner. Start with "I'm a..." whatever it is you do for a living. Next, tell people what you actually do for someone. For example: "I coordinate our annual health care conference for 5,000 people." After that, get a little creative about what you do for people: "I create the party of the year where hardworking employees kick up their heels and get a little crazy." If you say that, people will be intrigued—"How do you do that? What do you do at this party? I want to go to that one." It's a conversation starter and raises emotion; people pay attention even if they weren't before. Sometimes it can't be funny—there are certain settings—but often you can use some levity to break the ice.

We're going to break out in groups; you'll practice with someone and tell them what you do. Your group will help give you tips and advice.

So, quickly: the three points. One, say, "I'm a..." whatever it is you do. Two, tell people what you actually do in your job. Three, say something interesting about the job in a funny or quaint way that elicits an emotional connection. You can use lead-ins like, "But really, I..." or "Basically, it's all about..." Any lead-in works; those work well.

Turn to the person next to you and you're each going to give your 30-second speech.

"My name is Jason Treu."

"I sell to a retail store, so pretty much I'm on the phone all day. Lots of diamonds to retailers."

"I work for a Chamber of Commerce. I post cat memes."

"I do commodity markets and specialized technical analysis."

"I'm a web developer. I work in advertising and I make really cool websites that businesses sell from. I'm like a magician that actually makes everything work at the end of the day."

"I'm a financial advisor in sales. What I actually do is try to make people's lives better with their money and help them see things they are not aware of."

"What I do is solve problems that companies will not or do not want to solve. I customize accounting software to work the way their business wants to work; if you use it out of the box, it's not going to work the way you want."

"I'm a salesman for a manufacturing and distribution company. We sell hydraulic and electrical tools used in the construction industry. My primary role is to demonstrate products to prospective clients, do product training, provide customer service, answer questions, and implement solutions for major construction projects."

So if someone were to ask me that question, again, depending on the audience I have and who it is, and especially for my business, because I have sort of moving audiences depending on who it is, typically what I'd say to someone is, hi, I'm Jason Treu. I'm a business coach and relationship expert. I help people authentically influence, stand out, and get known to create the life that they love. And on top of that, if I had more time, I'd say I work with entrepreneurs, executives, and experts, and I published a book in September.

The time that they did their 30-second talk was a little rough, but each and every time they did it, it got a little better. They met some cool people. Awesome. Any questions? Cool people—that's what you actually are doing. And I think one of the things is when you start leading in a conversation with, "What are you passionate about?" if you can try to help someone right away in a conversation, that's powerful. We didn't really talk about this, but the next level of networking is asking people, "Who do you think I should talk to?" or "Do you have anyone I should meet?" or "Are there events or places I should go?" You can ask people for advice as you move forward in the conversation, but you need to add value first, because then people will actually go out of their way to help you.

Many times you really can't help immediately, but you can follow up the next day and say, "Look, I tried." People appreciate that, because honestly, that rarely happens. If you look in sales, most people lose deals because they don't follow up enough, and in networking it's absolutely horrendous. I had an executive who went to the TED Conference; we worked on a whole plan for an entire month, and he walked away emailing Bill Gates—Bill Gates actually responded, though it was short—and we were talking to Tim Cook. Tim Cook might even fly to the Alabama–Auburn game and meet my client. He led the conversation with that, he talked about it, he did research on it, and then he followed up. He followed up with all the people he met at TED, most of them emailed back, and he's got an ongoing conversation and a Rolodex of thirty people who are doing amazing things because he actually followed up. And believe it or not, that's something people rarely do, even with people they actually need in their network.

Yes? Hey, so I got a question too. You kind of alluded to it earlier—you said you never want to say, "Hey, what do you do for a living." We always get asked that in our young professional lives. How would you respond to that to kind of deflect and open it up to be more approachable and really get that trust to add value? What are some good ideas if you don't want to just say, "Hey, I'm a fix-a-flat guy"?

I think if you steer the conversation away from work, you're better off. People go out to escape their lives; they don't go out to talk about what they did at work. They go out to meet other people, whether socially or romantically, and that's the primary reason they go out. Even at charity events or business networking, that's secondary. If you keep that in mind, phrase the conversation around personal interests: ask people, "What did you do for the weekend? What's on your agenda for this week? What vacations do you have planned? What fun things do you enjoy doing in the city? What are you passionate about?" It's much easier to get those answers, and when you later ask, "So, what do you do?" people actually think you care because you asked other personal questions first.

If you ask "What do you do?" on the front side, people who have to answer it a thousand times get worn out; their eyes dart around, they're not present. I see that all the time. When you asked earlier, you had a great answer about being a matchmaker—that's a creative way to frame what you do. If you're a real estate agent and you say, "I sell real estate," people tune out. But if you say, "I'm a matchmaker between people and homes," or "I match people with the right neighborhoods," that actually stops someone and prompts another question, because they think, "Wow, this person must be creative or really good at what he does, and I need him in my network."

Thank you, Jason. That's perfect.

Okay, so you've got your elevator pitch down, and the person you're networking with is truly engaged and it's going well. At what point of the conversation should I give them my business card?

I think after you ask them a question and try to add value, that's the time you exchange cards. Then people know you're a giver and not a taker, and they're more receptive to the exchange. It's not something you sneak in at the end like, "Nice meeting you, here's my card." If you can say, "I'd love to reach out and connect and stay in contact," and they tell you something they need help with, the follow-up is easy: "Can I get your card? I'll follow up with you on that." It's better to exchange cards than just hand yours over. Sometimes people don't have cards, so you go with the flow, but if you can try to help them and tell them you will, people will want to give their contact information because everyone needs help.